you may remember i had a wedding to go to this weekend. and, as with all weddings i go to, i had one goal…to have great sex with a cute boy in a suit. did i win? yes! and let me add this may have been my favorite walk of shame of all time.
i was wearing a very boobalicious dress that had a band of black sequins underneath, fishnet stockings, 4-inch purple peep-toe crocodile heels and a vintage mink stole. i know it sounds like a sort of slutty-rific outfit for a wedding, but it was that kind of party.
making my walk of shame at 11 am on a sunday morning in 4 inch purple heels and an evening dress, was enough to make it the best walk, but when i got back to my apartment and went to open the door, my landlord was on the other side coming out. now that made my day. getting busted by the landlord! icing on the cake (especially since my landlord is a hottie)
i’ve added pics of parts of my outfit above so you can laugh at me.
oh, and bonus! i got to cross off one of the items on my sex bucket list: i got to give a guy head in the backseat of a cab.
if you haven’t been watching the HBO series True Blood, i suggest starting. it’s like porn for women. and not like that really awful porn for women that studios in the valley try to make for us. the series is all about vampires, and i think most women from a very early age have been turned on by vampires.
i can remember back to watching The Lost Boys for the very first time and wishing i was jaime gertz just so i could have hot vamps keifer sutherland and jason patrick fighting over me.
true blood has some of the hottest sex scenes i’ve seen in a while, combined with a very entertaining storyline. so just check it out.
Madonna and Guy Richie (AP Photo)
we all know the stereotypes. big girls are more fun in bed. big girls give the best head. you can use their tits for pillows when you cuddle (not a stereotype i suppose.)
but according to this story from The Times of India, it’s looking like madonna’s soon to be ex-husband, guy ritchie, will be looking to find himself a big girl to keep him company for a little while to make up for the fun that has been missing in his sex life if the story is true:
From the Times of India:
Guy Ritchie had apparently told his friends that he had almost no sex life with wife Madonna as she was obsessed with her daily four-hour workout regime.
Guy is said to have made repeated pleas claiming that they should spend more time with each other but was turned down by the singer owing to her fixation with her exercising routine.
“He got more and more frustrated as she spent nearly half the day working out. Afterwards she’d be too tired to make love,” News of the World quoted a close pal of the couple as saying. “And towards the end Guy wouldn’t be there. He’d get fed up waiting for her and go down the pub with his mates,” the pal added.
The close friend further revealed that even when the couple did indulge themselves in acts of passion, Guy reportedly felt he lay with a bunch of bones.
The friend said: “After a few drinks one evening Guy said it was like cuddling up to a piece of gristle.
“All the soft feminine tones have been replaced by the build of an athlete.”
guy, the stereotypes are true. and i love british guys. call me.