depression of 2008

bread line (courtesy of AP Photo)

i know this economy is in the shitter when someone like me gets laid off. i have never lost a job in my life. usually bosses try to bribe me to stay when i want to move on. so the fact that i’m applying for unemployment is a very telling tale.

so while i am bitter and angry, i’ve decided to use my time and severance pay wisely and do all those things that one can never when they have to work:

1. crab crackin’ mondays at red lobster

2. happy hour at lure fishbar in soho (best fucking raw oysters, shrimp tempura, and grapefruit margaritas EVER)

3. movies, movies movies (i still haven’t even seen the dark knight for god’s sake)

4. museums – only the one’s that are free or have a suggested donation. i have no shame in handing that art major asshole behind the register a dollar bill to see some of the greatest works of art in the world

5. statue of liberty and staten island ferry – i don’t actually want to get off and touch staten island, but i heard the ferry ride is fun

6. hang out with my buddies ron and fez

7. make my bath and body products – people have been missing my amazing lip balms and shea butter creams. i owe them lots and lots of moisture.

8. go to lots of ranges – shooting and golf – shooting things and hitting balls will be therapeutic for me

9. go gold digging. this is probably the best time to look for a sugar daddy


Filed under leftovers

7 responses to “depression of 2008

  1. custador

    Bummer. What was your job?

  2. keshia

    i was a radio producer and host for sirius before the big merger that caused several layoffs

  3. Jason

    when would you like me to meet you at the fish bar? Remember your knee highs in case we go bowling after.

  4. keshia

    that depends…would you prefer to go into work hungover on friday or wake up on the floor of your apartment on saturday?

  5. Jason

    hmm. so long as it doesn’t end in me sharing my bed with 2 other people again.

  6. Minimadden

    Keshia fan since day 1! While you’re checking out the free museums, don’t forget about the open bars all over NYC too, is for suckers, check out, those are the good ones!

  7. Kim

    That sucks – they should have laid off all the XM weenies – after all, Sirius was the taking over company!!!

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